Life Hack #5 -- You're never fully dressed without a smile

We live on a quiet street that connects to a park where my girls and I spend tons of time.  Last summer as we walked the path to the park, I saw a grandma visibly jump when she saw us emerge from the woods.  What gives, I thought. This is our turf.  We're not even playing Ursula and Owlette yet. Then I dropped Elle's blanket and when I stooped to pick it up, I realized I was dressed in cropped navy sweats that I had worn while painting Grace's bedroom pink, a gray nursing tank, flip flops, a scraggly top knot, and no make up (read, no eyebrows). My girls looked darling, as kids do, and it registered that I looked like a meth head who had abducted them and was making off with them through the woods, with a quick pause at the park to keep them from screaming for their real mom.   

I remember that scenario from time to time, and it's made me think about how I've acquired clothing since I got pregnant with Grace:    

My sisters hand me ups.

Costco.

Any children's store that has an adult clearance section.

Let me tell you how I dressed myself in the adult years before I got pregnant with Grace:

Awesomely.  

It was my birthday recently, and because of all the things you just read, I decided to spend a little birthday money on myself, in hopes of not alarming grandmothers at the park this spring. I walked into Nordstrom and the doors opened to the children's department.  Ah, I thought. Lovely.  I felt instantly at home, picking out matching spring dresses for the girls, and after checking the price tags, hanging them right back up again. Where the heck is Mimi?  Who is going to buy these offensively over-priced but adorable dresses? Where the heck are the children?  What am I doing here, anyway? And it dawned on me: I HAVE TO SHOP FOR MYSELF. And, I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO DO IT ANYMORE.  

Pre-motherhood, I had no problem spending my free time shopping; now, I felt as though I was wasting precious babysitting minutes, wandering aimlessly between rounders of clothing.  Would I wear these high waisted jeans to the library? Why am I sweating?  Is this machine washable? Why does everyone here look so young and carefree and why is that stressing me out?  

Frankly, I think part of the reason I've avoided shopping is not just because I have little time and money to spend, but more because I had to focus just on ME.  More specifically, the physical me, and how we dress her to reflect the inside me.  The physical me who bore two long, skinny alien babies, who, in a roundabout way, cause me to look like a runaway meth head from time to time.

Sounds fun. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

I eventually muddled my way through and found some cute things, but the whole experience left me a little edgy and full of doubt.  And sweaty.

Then, lo and behold, when I got home from shopping, this little leaflet was waiting in my mailbox.  ↓↓

Have you heard of Stitch Fix?  It's a personal styling service that sends hand picked items to your door, with free shipping and returns. It's not a subscription like other services, so you can order at your leisure, or, if you really like it, you can set up a monthly or bi monthly delivery.  $20 gets you a stylist to curate a look, and then that $20 is deducted from any items you choose to purchase....no purchases, you're out $20.  It was a $20 gamble I was willing to take for your sake, dear reader.  You're welcome.

To get started, you fill a profile on your sizes, your lifestyle, and your personal style. They ask for links to relevant social media accounts, a brief personal statement, and what sort of items you're interested in receiving.  I told them I am heading to San Diego soon and I'd like a few cute pieces that are appropriate for family stuff on the go.  About a week later, this is what showed up in my box, along with a personalized note from my stylist that included a few visuals on how to style each piece.  Take a look-see:

First impressions?  Not bad!  I love a good pair of jeans, and I'm always wearing layers, so the tank and jacket made sense.  The dress didn't wow me, but I kept an open mind.  I liked the necklace, but at $35, and since I already own something very similar, I knew it wasn't going to be a keeper.  

I tried on the dress first.  My thoughts?  Bad color, bad fit, I look bad.  

Gilli Anwen Jersey Dress, $64

Another angle.  Still bad.  

I tried it with the jacket. The jacket is faux leather and I'm not into faux leather.  Had it been khaki or another material I think I would have liked it.  It did fix the problem of the dress though.  😜

RD Style Rhonda Faux Leather Jacket, $78

Moving right along to outfit number two:

Bay to Baubles Selena Crystal Flower Necklace, $34
Scotch and Soda Zazi Cami, $54
 Kut from the Kloth Simmons Bootcut Jean, $88

First impressions? I love the jeans!  They fit great, are super comfortable, long enough, I like the dark wash, and at $88, I thought they were fairly priced. The tank?  Cute color and cut, but it was too big.  I couldn't get the top to lay right without gapping, and for $55 I didn't think it was worth the risk.  

Another angle, featuring the face I make when Grace repeatedly jumps on Georgia's squeaky toy at the base of the steps while her sister is upstairs napping.

I tried tucking in the tank to see if that helped, but it didn't.

Added the jacket to get the full effect. Looks like my Fleet Farm catalog days ↓. Yikes. 

The jeans were the only winner.  But honestly, finding a good pair of jeans is a feat in itself, am I right?   Since I am a responsible journalist mediocre blogger, I checked the prices of the items online and found no price gouging, but I DID stumble across two other bloggers who WERE SENT THE SAME WEIRD DRESS.  That was a slight red flag for me, but I can see how it might be a "safe" starter piece as your stylist learns more about you.  I also learned that Stitch Fix has been around since at least 2011, and they buy their items wholesale, just like other retailers, so you're not getting leftovers from Nieman Marcus or Nordstrom Rack (SOUND FAMILIAR FORD GIRLS?)

In conclusion.  Did I love Stitch Fix?  Eh.  Do I see the utility in such a service?  Totally.  It was an interesting experience, but I guess I still like designing my own looks, sweaty dressing room moment-of-truth and all.   I did appreciate having someone else's take on a trendy look; for example, I never would have picked bootcut jeans, but I've worn them numerous times in the three weeks I've had them. Would I try it again?  Possibly.  I have a few weddings this summer, and if I don't have time to find myself a complete ensemble, I would ask Stitch Fix to help me.

The best thing I discovered from this process is that a healthy, non-judgmental look in the mirror every now and again is a good and necessary thing, and using "I'm a mom" as an excuse for everything looking like a slob doesn't really work -- it's like using a band aid on a cold sore. You're not fooling anyone, and it's not going to fix it, right?  As it turns out, spending a few hours on myself was fun, after the initial, sweaty shock wore off.  I feel like I still got it, whatever that means. ← And that right there, that's a big win.

If you're interested in learning more about Stitch Fix, you can use my referral code below.  They style men, women, maternity, special occasion...check it out! ↓

https://www.stitchfix.com/referral/11167536?sod=w&som=c

PS) This post was not sponsored.